Monday, 27 June 2016

Hell Reviews - Naruto the Movie: Road to Ninja - There's pictures in this one!

Synopsis: Long ago, a masked shinobi unleashed the Nine-Tailed Fox onto the Village Hidden in the Leaves to spread chaos and destruction. But the Fourth Hokage, Minato Namikaze, and his wife, Kushina Uzumaki, sealed the Tailed Beast into their newborn son Naruto to save the village, foiling the shinobi's plans.
Years later, Naruto and his friends succeed in driving away the infamous Akatsuki, who have mysteriously returned from the dead. Upon returning to the village, the young shinobi are praised by their families for completing a dangerous mission. Reminded of how alone he is, Naruto begins to wonder what it's like to have parents, when a strange masked figure appears before him - the same masked shinobi responsible for the death of his parents!
I know, I know.
Hell...this isn't a horror movie!
I'm fully aware, but shockingly I do also enjoy stuff that isn't just blood and gore and violence...and torture porn...and ghosts....and scary.
You know what I gotta say about that?
This is my review page and I'll do as I like.

Yes, I used to be a big Naruto fan in my college days.
Nine years ago I went through that phase and I lived through it, surviving to tell the tale.
Eventually I ended up giving up, I slowly lost interest in it altogether, I had about two and a half box sets of the genin series and got about one book away before the Shippuden series and I lost interest completely.
By this point it had been going for a good few years, Shippuden was well on its way and I was just very very slow to buy the books as other series took priority and eventually my interest had gone by the time I was part way through reading book 24 so I sold almost all my Naruto stuff to my younger brother who had picked up on his older siblings habits…as they do.

Skip to many years down the line, I still have casual conversations about the series, heck I still do sad little rp’s with my friend on Skype to pass the time and have a laugh, but my interest in the series itself never picked back up, I just never lost my love for some of the characters.

Yes, I was one of those girls that liked…and still like….Sasuke Uchiha, despite how much of an ass he is. I know, I know…but I like dark haired, broody jerks, and I dislike how it ended (it seems to push past fifteen years worth of character development, but that's my opinion) come at me, I have my shuriken ready.

Anyway, to the point, my younger brother (not the one who got my Naruto and Soul Eater stuff, another one) mentioned a certain Naruto part about being in an alternate universe where Sasuke is a total playboy and all that and I am a total stickler for alternate universe stuff.
I absolutely love it.
….But I forgot about that for a while and went on with my life as I do.
Wandering in the darkness by myself to avenge my fallen brother.
I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known…

Sorry…my inner Sasuke took over there.

So skip to about a year ago and this bro was down again and we gotsa talking about it again and having a laugh, he leaves and I’m like; You know what? Maybe I will watch it, this could be fun.
And I do!
Then I watch Rock Lee, Springtime of Youth…hoo boy what a series that one was!
That was the series that made me fall in love with poor Neji, who I thought was too arrogant as a child...I'm glad he grew out of that.
But just look at these! How cute are they?!

But we’re here to review Naruto the Movie: Road to Ninja.

So right off the bat let me say…what the hell is with the cover of the DVD?!
Why is it advertised as such?
I know other covers have more to do with the film in other countries, but I went to the UK Amazon and ‘this’ cover is the one that was the most used.

He is in it for like three scenes for barely two minutes at a time and not even in that outfit!
They have maybe one, very bad ass, scene. This film needs more Tobi!
But He is in it…and that’s okay by me.
Heck, even the damn synopsis is lazy and barely grazes the surface of the mentalness this film is.

On another note, this happens:
Needless to say...I was not prepared.

Now the story itself is alright, it's not the best alternate universe thing I've seen, but there are some things you just can't help but smile over.
I also like the main antagonist, I won't tell you who he is but let me tell you...he's pretty cool.
It's a good, cohesive story that doesn't really affect the main canon of the rest of the series, it's a filler movie essentially.
But when you're in the Naruto fandom you kind of expect filler and lots of it.
This is enjoyable filler though, despite being out of the fandom for a good few years I still found myself enjoying it and laughing at the inside jokes and the character differences.

The characters alternate selves are quite a laugh, I mean what's better than a dog hating Kiba and a bug hating Shino?
Let me tell you....very few things when it comes to Naruto...outside of Naruto? A fair bit to be honest.
It was nice to see Hinata with more confidence too, because bugger me does usually timid Hinata bug the hell out of me!

The main focus of this story is on Naruto and Sakura, and let me say off the bat...I didn't think Sakura could get more bloody annoying.
There's a scene before the alternate reality takes place where Sakura and Naruto are moping on a swing set, Naruto because he doesn't have parents to recommend his boost in position like the other teens are getting due to a mission and gone great....and Sakura because her parents are bloody sensible and don't think she's ready enough.
So what does she do?
Accept that maybe her parents are right and that she isn't ready for such a step?
Oh no, she shit talks her parents to the boy who is down because he hasn't got any.
Now, I know teenagers are selfish little buggers, but even the most obnoxious person wouldn't shit talk like that to a supposed friend who has been an orphan and at one point described as 'unwanted'.
That particular scene rubbed me the wrong way and soured me more to her character, and I have never been a fan of Sakura.
Don't get me wrong, Naruto gets under my skin too.
I don't get on well with characters who are too excited and yelly and gleeful....this may be due to my 'emotionless' and 'heartless' disposition, but I just don't get on well with them.
So that was my indication of just how shitty it was for her to do that, when you make me feel bad for Naruto then you know you've messed up. (Yes...I did almost write 'dun goofed' then.)
Of course by the end she learns to appreciate her parents and accept that she has it good, but with her entire attitude throughout the whole film it's too little, too late by that point.
Though there is a scene where alternate world Hinata pretty much tells her straight how shitty she is, and it is such a glorious scene.

It was sweet to see Naruto spending time with his parents, Minato is as kick ass as ever.
I never thought I'd miss a character I was never properly introduced to, as I'd stopped reading by that point, but I did!
Minato...come back!
Otherwise I found Naruto's scenes rather blah, and the constant parallels between him and his dad did my nut in. I personally don't like it when media does this 'parallel characters with others' thing, but it's a cliché and a trope and you kind of have to get used to it.

As mentioned before, the Akatsuki are in it for a short amount of time, once at the beginning of the film and then again later on...fighting for the good side?
Weird, I know, but kinda funny.

Over all, it's an alright filler film to waste time with when you have some spare.
Would it get me back into the series?
No, not at all...I'm afraid I'm too far gone for that, but it was good for some light entertainment.
Would I watch it again?
Probably not, no.
But thanks for keeping me momentarily pleased.

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